... that I wish I could bring myself to write and use one day ...
Dear ______,
You couldn't manage your way out of a paper bag with a flash light, google maps, and a sherpa guide.
To describe your management of the company as anything other than gross incompetency would be to say that the captain of the Titanic was a super hero who shat rainbows and cured world hunger.
Your business decisions could be described as the 'dartboard and blindfold' method, while your handling of customer complaints is akin to strapping explosives to a donkey and sending it into a crowded market.
Fuck you, strong letter to follow.
Sincerely
_______